It’s 5:10 p.m. in the CNN Situation Room. The music for Breaking News blares and alerts viewers to upcoming news. Wolf Blitzer comes on air and can barely control his excitement:

“We interrupt CNN coverage of the bird that landed on Bernie Sander’s podium to bring you breaking news on the Republican campaign for president. For this, we go to CNN Political Correspondent Pamela Brown outside the Trump mansion in Palm Beach, Florida. Pamela, what say you?”

Brown nods repeatedly with a microphone and announces: “Wolf, I’m here outside the Trump mansion in Florida with a major development. The Trump campaign is no longer ridiculing Ted Cruz’s wife, and is now going all out against his mother.”

Wolf sits forward in his chair in excitement: “His mother? What about his mother? Is this about whether she was actually a U.S. citizen when Senator Cruz was born in Canada? Or is there another issue with Mrs. Cruz?”

Brown: “All good questions, Wolf. Let me address one at a time. At a press conference this morning, Donald Trump launched a scathing personal attack on her character and preference in men.”

Blitzer: “What kind of attack? Has he decided to quit attacking Cruz’s wife? Are the Cruz children in any way involved?”

Brown: “Trump said to Senator Cruz: ‘Your momma wears army boots and swims out to meet troop ships.’”

Blitzer: “What kind of boots? Are they American army boots or Cuban? Or maybe Canadian? And what country are the troops ships from?”

Brown: “He did not specify, but he also said to Cruz: ‘Your momma is so ugly that when she watches TV, the channels change themselves.’”

Blitzer: “What channels? Are there any particular programs that change themselves?”

Brown: “The channels aren’t relevant. The point is—–“

Blitzer: “Hold on a minute, Pamela. We are now getting a report from Cruz headquarters in Houston from Dana Bash. Dana, what can you tell us about the TV channel controversy?”

Bash: “Wolf, a spokesman for Senator Cruz said the comment about the senator’s mother is blatantly false—she rarely wears army boots and never swims to troop ships, even American ones.”

Blitzer: “So these unprecedented charges are false?”

Bash: “Senator Cruz just made the following statement: ‘The Donald’s accusations of my momma’s army boots, troop ship visits and TV stations changing are complete fabrications. He is in a bad place to criticize. To him I say, Donald your momma is so ugly, she didn’t need a costume for a part in the original Star Wars bar scene.’”

Blitzer: “Dana, do you know what character Mrs. Trump played in the Star Wars bar scene? Was she part of the band?”

Bash: “We called the Star Wars Producer George Lucas about the bar scene accusation. He could not remember exactly but thought she may have been the green horn player.”

Blitzer: “Thanks, Dana. We’re eagerly awaiting confirmation of the Star Wars story. Now back to Palm Beach where Donald Trump is launching a new round of ‘Your Momma’ attacks. Later, if time permits, we will cover today’s arrest of three terrorist suspects in Belgium.”

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